"A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something."
— Wilson Mizner (1876 - 1933)
As I have mentioned before, communication is one of the most important keys to a successfull life. And communication is more than being a good speaker, as it equally involves being a good listener.
Another interesting tactic in effective communication is going into the conversation with the thought that "I know nothing". When I listen to someone as if I already know all there is to know about the message or the information being presented, I might miss the insights I need to get in order to progress to the next level of growth, fullfilment, and success in my life path.
If a person is full of self-satisfaction and thinks they have all the answers, they close themselves off from receiving wisdom from all the sources available in their life.
Thursday, June 30, 2005
Respecting the individual
"We must respect the body as an individual planet. No person should try to own another. We should assign ourselves to assist and to help one another, but never try to own or possess. Jealousy is a deadly disease which disintegrates the body."
— "Mr. A", in Born to Heal by Ruth Montgomery
There seems to be some confusion over what jealousy is really all about. Some seem to believe that it has everything to do with loving someone. But when jealousy enters into a relationship, anger is soon to follow. Anger and fear are two of the greatest emotional setbacks a person can experience. They can actually make a person sick by drawing out all the energy from the body where it is needed to maintain optimum health and placing it into the negative emotion instead.
Think back to any of your relationships, past or present, that entertained jealousy on either side. How well did the relationship do? Did it survive? Did it blossom? More than likely it did not. Jealously drains the soul and depleats any love that may have been there in the first place.
Remember the Law of Attraction: like attracts like. If you are a loving, giving, and respectful person in a relationship, you will attract the same in your partner. Focus on respecting the individual in yourself and in your partner and you will see your love grow.
— "Mr. A", in Born to Heal by Ruth Montgomery
There seems to be some confusion over what jealousy is really all about. Some seem to believe that it has everything to do with loving someone. But when jealousy enters into a relationship, anger is soon to follow. Anger and fear are two of the greatest emotional setbacks a person can experience. They can actually make a person sick by drawing out all the energy from the body where it is needed to maintain optimum health and placing it into the negative emotion instead.
Think back to any of your relationships, past or present, that entertained jealousy on either side. How well did the relationship do? Did it survive? Did it blossom? More than likely it did not. Jealously drains the soul and depleats any love that may have been there in the first place.
Remember the Law of Attraction: like attracts like. If you are a loving, giving, and respectful person in a relationship, you will attract the same in your partner. Focus on respecting the individual in yourself and in your partner and you will see your love grow.
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Going to L.A.
Just to let you all know, we are going to be closed down for the month of July (June 28th to July 29th exactly). This means that we will not be sending out our daily e-mail inspirations during that period. However, I personally am going to do my best to post daily inspirations on this blog site which you can read and also comment on at your leisure.
We have some exciting stuff in development that we are anxious to share with you all in the very near future. Hopefully, we will have something to announce in August once we are all recharged and ready to go for the rest of the year.
Don't forget to bookmark this site and make use of the comment feature so that we can all help each other through life's challenges.
Have a great summer.
We have some exciting stuff in development that we are anxious to share with you all in the very near future. Hopefully, we will have something to announce in August once we are all recharged and ready to go for the rest of the year.
Don't forget to bookmark this site and make use of the comment feature so that we can all help each other through life's challenges.
Have a great summer.
You are not the emotion
"Men decide far more problems by hate, love, lust, rage, sorrow, joy, hope, fear, illusion, or some other inward emotion, than by reality, authority, any legal standard, judicial precedent, or statute."
— Cicero (106 - 43 BC)
Take a look around at a child that falls down. What is the first thing they do? They look up to see if anyone saw them fall. If no one is around, they get up and keep going like nothing happened. If there is someone there, the tears start to fall and the drama begins. But usually, you can give that "boo-boo" a kiss and once again they will be up and running around having fun.
Adults unfortunately have forgotten what it is like to let go of their emotions once they are done with them. Do you catch yourself saying things like, "I am sad" or "I am angry"? In others words you ARE the emotion, not just a person experiencing the emotion. What we should be saying is "I feel sad" or "I feel angry". This allows for you to observe the emotion but not become the emotion. It will also allow the emotion to roll off you once you are done "playing" with it.
*****
The other funny thing about emotions is that sometimes the more you get caught up in them, the harder it is to remember why you were having the emotion in the first place. If you become so involved or concerned about having a drama scene instead of having an emotional experience, you most likely will not benefit from anything the emotion could teach you in the first place. Emotions are not the bad guys in this picture. It is simply how we choose to use the emotions that can end up all wrong.
When you find yourself stuck in an old emotion, picture it as a stone in your fist. Squeeze it hard and for a long time. As you notice how uncomfortable it becomes also notice how normal it feels to have this uncomfortable sensation. Now open your hand, roll the stone around and see that it is not a part of your body. Then take the big step and let it roll right out of your hand. It's that easy. Your hand doesn't need to keep squeezing it even though it has gotten used to holding it tight. You are not the emotion.
— Cicero (106 - 43 BC)
Take a look around at a child that falls down. What is the first thing they do? They look up to see if anyone saw them fall. If no one is around, they get up and keep going like nothing happened. If there is someone there, the tears start to fall and the drama begins. But usually, you can give that "boo-boo" a kiss and once again they will be up and running around having fun.
Adults unfortunately have forgotten what it is like to let go of their emotions once they are done with them. Do you catch yourself saying things like, "I am sad" or "I am angry"? In others words you ARE the emotion, not just a person experiencing the emotion. What we should be saying is "I feel sad" or "I feel angry". This allows for you to observe the emotion but not become the emotion. It will also allow the emotion to roll off you once you are done "playing" with it.
*****
The other funny thing about emotions is that sometimes the more you get caught up in them, the harder it is to remember why you were having the emotion in the first place. If you become so involved or concerned about having a drama scene instead of having an emotional experience, you most likely will not benefit from anything the emotion could teach you in the first place. Emotions are not the bad guys in this picture. It is simply how we choose to use the emotions that can end up all wrong.
When you find yourself stuck in an old emotion, picture it as a stone in your fist. Squeeze it hard and for a long time. As you notice how uncomfortable it becomes also notice how normal it feels to have this uncomfortable sensation. Now open your hand, roll the stone around and see that it is not a part of your body. Then take the big step and let it roll right out of your hand. It's that easy. Your hand doesn't need to keep squeezing it even though it has gotten used to holding it tight. You are not the emotion.
Friday, June 03, 2005
Anger Management
"Speak when you are angry — and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret."
— Laurence J. Peter (1919-1988)
Research has documented the important role that expression or repression of anger and hostility plays in disease progression. Physical activity can be a healthy catharsis for this most abrasive emotion. It can provide a socially acceptable means of physically releasing negative energy. No matter what you do, from kickboxing to yoga, the physical release of energy appears to dissipate feelings of anger in a positive way. After just 20 minutes of exercise, the brain starts releasing epinephrine and endorphins into the system, which lower tension and help stress stabilization.
*****
Also, just a quick note to remind you that you should not just ignore your anger. There is a message in it, if you can calm yourself down long enough to look deeper into the emotion. Ask yourself why you are really angry? Sometimes slowing yourself down to think will also give you a more appropriate and effective resolution to the true issue at heart.
— Laurence J. Peter (1919-1988)
Research has documented the important role that expression or repression of anger and hostility plays in disease progression. Physical activity can be a healthy catharsis for this most abrasive emotion. It can provide a socially acceptable means of physically releasing negative energy. No matter what you do, from kickboxing to yoga, the physical release of energy appears to dissipate feelings of anger in a positive way. After just 20 minutes of exercise, the brain starts releasing epinephrine and endorphins into the system, which lower tension and help stress stabilization.
*****
Also, just a quick note to remind you that you should not just ignore your anger. There is a message in it, if you can calm yourself down long enough to look deeper into the emotion. Ask yourself why you are really angry? Sometimes slowing yourself down to think will also give you a more appropriate and effective resolution to the true issue at heart.
Thursday, June 02, 2005
This is Success
"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded."
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you were to ask someone what would make them happiest in life, a large majority would most likely give answers like: "Spending more time with my kids", "Having more free time to go out with friends", "Getting the garden looking like I've always dreamed it would", "Going out to camp, or fish, or travel". These are the things that make our body, mind, and soul feel complete.
Strangely enough, the same people who gave these answers are the same ones that are working 24-7 to get the bigger house, more expensive car, and the bigger title. Which means they don't have the time for their kids, friends, garden, camping, fishing, or traveling.
If you find that you too are stuck in this self-deceiving cycle, write down the things that would truly make you happy and post them someplace that you will see them constantly as a daily reminder to what really counts in your life. Start living true to your inner guidance for happiness.
****
This is can be a tough one. As I grew up in a large family, material "things" were not usually used as signs of success. There were not many "things" to go around. But I did have the fortune to have parents that valued nature and saw the importance of getting a nature retreat for the whole family to get away to every spring all the way to the last leaf dropping in the fall, and even sometimes during some wonderfully white winters. Yeah, I might not have gone away to Florida or the Caribbean like some of my friends did during March break, but I would never want to give back my cottage memories for a couple of trips to sunny places.
But strangely enough, it still must have affected me to some level of my being, because we certainly have done Florida with my kids many, many more times that I would have ever imagined doing as a child myself. This being said I feel that I sometimes work far too much and too hard to get these "things" and as a price I don't get to spend as much time with my kids.
It all comes down to balance. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with getting a bigger house, or more expensive car, or a bigger title if you are not sacrificing the things that matter most to you in your life. If you can enjoy life to it's fullest and get all the material toys and goodies that you want at the same time, all the power to you. Just don't get lost on the way.
— Ralph Waldo Emerson
If you were to ask someone what would make them happiest in life, a large majority would most likely give answers like: "Spending more time with my kids", "Having more free time to go out with friends", "Getting the garden looking like I've always dreamed it would", "Going out to camp, or fish, or travel". These are the things that make our body, mind, and soul feel complete.
Strangely enough, the same people who gave these answers are the same ones that are working 24-7 to get the bigger house, more expensive car, and the bigger title. Which means they don't have the time for their kids, friends, garden, camping, fishing, or traveling.
If you find that you too are stuck in this self-deceiving cycle, write down the things that would truly make you happy and post them someplace that you will see them constantly as a daily reminder to what really counts in your life. Start living true to your inner guidance for happiness.
****
This is can be a tough one. As I grew up in a large family, material "things" were not usually used as signs of success. There were not many "things" to go around. But I did have the fortune to have parents that valued nature and saw the importance of getting a nature retreat for the whole family to get away to every spring all the way to the last leaf dropping in the fall, and even sometimes during some wonderfully white winters. Yeah, I might not have gone away to Florida or the Caribbean like some of my friends did during March break, but I would never want to give back my cottage memories for a couple of trips to sunny places.
But strangely enough, it still must have affected me to some level of my being, because we certainly have done Florida with my kids many, many more times that I would have ever imagined doing as a child myself. This being said I feel that I sometimes work far too much and too hard to get these "things" and as a price I don't get to spend as much time with my kids.
It all comes down to balance. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with getting a bigger house, or more expensive car, or a bigger title if you are not sacrificing the things that matter most to you in your life. If you can enjoy life to it's fullest and get all the material toys and goodies that you want at the same time, all the power to you. Just don't get lost on the way.
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