Bring out the steel umbrellas

"You have to make darn sure not to put yourself in the proximity of complainers. If you absolutely have to be nearby, make sure you bring a steel umbrella or the crap meant for them will get you too!"
— Harv Eker, Secrets of the Millionaire Mind

You know the saying, misery likes company? And by now, we understand that what we focus on expands. So if we are around people who complain a lot, then what they are attracting into their lives may spread to yours if you let it affect you.

There was this one relative of mine, and each time we spoke, I came away feeling really drained and found myself getting really aggravated by the littlest things she would say. I couldn't figure it out at first, but then I realized she was always complaining to me about how miserable her life is, and how horrible her childhood was. I would do my best to give her some empowering guidance or simply a sympathetic ear. But the story never changed. Instead of me helping her feel better, her negative energy was far stronger (and more rehearsed) so it ended up bringing my energy closer to her lower level.

Even though it is our intention to help, sometimes it is better for everyone to simply stay away from miserable people — at least the ones who have no intention of ever changing for the better. This can be tricky to do if you are in a profession that is out to help people in this state. And I am not suggesting that we abandon the souls in need. However, make sure you have your energy shields up to protect you from these misfortune magnets.

Kind words

"Kind words can be short and easy to speak but their echoes
are truly endless."
— Mother Teresa

I received a phone call from someone the other day that really made me realized how important it is to do simple gestures of kindness. I had met her only once before viewing her house in the endless array of house-hunting we had been doing. While she was showing me her beautiful garden, I mentioned that she
has beautiful eyes, which was simply a true and genuine compliment.

At the time, she blushed and was totally shocked that I would say that. It had been so long since anyone had ever said something so nice to her. It touched her so deeply and made her feel so good, she had to call me weeks later to say thank you.

It reminds me of how much I too crave simple gestures of kindness from time to time. Someone who gives a heart-felt compliment for no particular gain or reason and my day shines brighter because of it.

Let us never forget the simple kind gestures that can make a person's day go that much better. Let us be there to remind others that we are all beautiful people even when we don't hear it everyday. Reach out a warm loving hand to reassure someone in need and someone will be there for you when you need it too. Little by little we can brighten the smiles of the world with simple gestures of kindness.

Does it improve the silence?

"Before you speak, ask yourself, is it kind, is it necessary, is it
true, does it improve on the silence?"
— Sai Baba

I feel the above quote to be so well stated that it is hard for me to
add anything to it that could clarify on its wisdom. So this shall be
short and brief. When tempted to fill the silence with words, please
consider the question above carefully before you speak. Make sure what
you are saying is kind. Be certain that it is something that absolutely
needs to be said. Verify that what you are about to say is in fact true
and not just a hasty judgment or ego-driven opinion. And finally,
assure yourself that it will improve the situation or be helpful to
someone or something.

Knowledge junkies

"You see, in life, lots of people know what to do, but few people actually do what they know. Knowing is not enough! You must take action."
— Tony Robbins

For many years this was the way it was for me. I would read all these fantastic books on spirituality, health, wellness, etc. The academic in me would take it all in and I could happily report that I had read all these authors with their important messages of personal growth.

So why was my life such a mess? I knew it all, right?

Well, first off, I don't believe we will ever truly know it all. There is so much to know out there. And it is constantly evolving. And secondly, I didn't actually know this stuff since I wasn't actually living it.

Get off the knowledge junkie path and start taking action with all the knowledge you have built up in your life. I do believe we have the knowledge inside each and everyone of us for living to our highest potential if we would just do what we already know.

One Day at a Time

"The power to create quality of life is not in any planner. The power
to create quality of life is within us, in our ability to develop and
use our own inner-compass so that we can act with integrity in the
moment of choice."
— Stephen Covey

What will happen tomorrow? Or the next day? Or the next week, month,
year? Other than some fairly predictable norms in my life, I wouldn't
be able to answer that with much detail or accuracy because I simply
cannot know about something that has not yet happened. And what about
all the things that are going to happen that I can't even imagine at
this present moment? How will they affect the equation when I didn't
put them into my calculations?

So why do we take up so much of our time thinking, or worse yet,
worrying about the future when we have no way to know for certain what
it will entail?

No matter how challenging your situation appears to you at this time,
you can make it through one day at a time. Focus on the present day and
moment and what action steps you can take right now. Understand that
each conscious choice you make now will create the quality of life upon
which you decide.

Focus on the desired outcome

"Dream lofty dreams, and as you dream, so shall you become. Your vision
is the promise of what you shall one day be: your ideal is the prophecy
of what you shall at last unveil."
— James Allen

It is not easy to focus on a positive outcome when you are in the
middle of a crisis or life challenge. However, the most important thing
you can do at that point is to focus on what you want to happen, not
what is actually happening. As you may have heard with the Law of
Attraction, what you focus on expands. Remember, that means if you are
focusing on the negative possibilities, they will expand. If you are
focusing on the positive outcomes, they will expand.

Your vision of the positive outcome unfolding is like the map being
drawn, giving the future its direction.

5 Steps to Permanent, Positive Change

If you haven't requested your copy of my short report on 5 Steps to Permanent, Positive, Change go to http://www.RealLifeChanges.com and click on the book link. I will e-mail your copy to you within the shortest delay. This is a short summary of all the research I have done over the years on the best steps to take to make permanent, positive changes in your life.

The other step that I find truly reinforces your journey of change, is helping others by sharing your story. If you have made some significant breakthroughs, let us know what you experienced, how you came about them, etc. Or if you are looking for a helping hand or words of guidance, put out your questions and see if we can help you with your next steps.

Thanks for all of the positive feedback we have been receiving for our report.

Sincerely,

Rose-Anne
RealLifeChanges.com